Yoyodyne Monkey Works

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A cautionary tale for all my colleagues in the
Amateur SupraPhysical Experimentation Group!
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As we all know, teleportation of probes of through greater than line-of-sight distances using nonresolved lat-lon coordinates has always been problematic, resulting in chronic processor failure > 90% and structural delamination of the actual probe encapsulator. Here’s a new twist: one (fool)Hardy member^ tried using NO PheTet^^, spraying PetaShell directly over the newly available FireBee logger (We’ve a second bulk order in from AliBaba in case you didn’t get one on the first round; get in touch with Hubert for details). He assures me he let it cure for over twelve hours in an appropriate temperature- and humidity-controlled environment before proceeding (!!!) As you can see, it is very fortunate for him that he had the good sense to put the ignitor on a timer and remove himself from the immediate vicinity. The resulting space charge cycled the potting shed with it, and it is quite the wonder that it did not combust! (He did have to get rid of it… As you can see, it’s in such a shape that if he didn’t have it removed from the premises, the neighbor who got so agitated during last years’ October cookout would’ve been *very* suspicious). Tedious as it is, the results from your onboard Michelson-Morely Aether Interferometer *must* be calculated beyond twelve significant digits accurately in real *and* relative time. I don’t want to hurt any feelings here, but this MOOTS these ongoing “static vs. dynamic positional replacement hypothesis” argie-bargies that have consumed so much of our time at the quarterly meetings and let the brats and beans get cold before dinner. We don’t need a repetition of the whole Yamal thing; we are too close to success to let some big flashy Whoopie Cushion of an experiment encourage premature media attention towards our endeavors. As always, I am not scolding, I am trying to encourage. Gentlemen (and lady) of ASPEG, stay safe, and I hope to see you all in October! ps please let the main office know of ‘plus ones’ and special dietary needs BY September 15th. Thanks!

^We can kid Hubert because he has such a great sense of humor. I was trying to figure out how to take a poke at this myself when NanoShell proves to make vapor phase PheTet hypergolic at atmospheric torr parameters.

^^(high S-value phenylhydrobenzamine whose pericosity is stabilized with the introduction of 5% remanative tetryliodohexamine per Oriceddubg 1914, E.Lathrop Brown 1955 et.al)

Updated: January 26, 2017 — 4:35 pm

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